Hallelujah, Holy Shit! Where's the Tylenol?

i am back in c-town. the trip to stephen effin' austin wasn't all that bad. in fact, i really liked it down there, and might actually prefer it to the boston job. might.

i think the inevitability of the holidays has finally hit me. i always hold out every year, thinking maybe, somehow, christmas will just fly right over us, we'll miss it, and not even notice its absence. i'm not a bah-humbugger, but christmases have become harder to bear. emotions are running high, memories of pleasant holidays past come flooding in, and i'm usually left wrecked, drunk, and still lonesome. and then there's new year's.

but i'm starting to realize that the whole point of this time of year (religion aside) isn't just about me. it's bigger than that. it's about that feeling you get that leaves you thankful for what you have, and desiring to spread your love through any means possible with those who have not. you know the one. it's a warmth that you can feel spreading up out of your gut like you've just had a good pull of whiskey. your insides quiver at the sensation, your throat tingles, and your eyes begin to well up with tears. it's about reflection and a chance for a new beginning. i can't think of a single person who doesn't need some of that. a resolve to live your life as truly to yourself as possible can be as exhilerating as that first kiss with your crush. you know what's about to happen, you smile, close your eyes, and go for it. the uncertainty of the future can be a part of the excitement, and a source of anxiety, but you never know how great things could be until you go for it.


besides, without christmas, we wouldn't have such masterpieces as National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Love Actually, a Christmas Story, Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo, and countless others.